24 and what a bore!

Man...

Everyday I heal just a little more, and every one of those days, I want it that much more badder to be his friend.
He called last night as I was about to pass out (I had been out drinking too) and I was misunderstanding and assuming stuff about him wanting to come by tomorrow to get the rest of his stuff. I told him I didn't want that and that Thursday would be better. Then he'd say something and I'd reply and he would accuse me of arguing. I really wasn't! I even told him I wasn't trying to argue and jumped straight into saying that I wanted more than anything to be his friend. I think he said something about needing time still before he could have that friendship with me.
That's so frustrating. If he hasn't healed like I've healed by now, then maybe he was so in love with me that he shouldn't have dumped me!
After talks like that and finding out harsh truths, I just want to cry. I still hate that we have broken up. I still hate how I've been really good with being civil and neutral with him and he just blows me off.
I still hope that one day he changes his mind about us and wants to be together and believes that we can work. If and when that day comes, and if I happen to be in a relationship at that same time, I won't have a problem turning him down. But I'm not going to hold out for him. I'll let things happen for ME at the world's and God's own pace. It would just be nice, because of the way I'm still feeling, if he'll come around SOONER, with a friendship or a relationship. I'll take what I can get at this point.
Brian Krank I miss you so much you have no idea.